Vol. 101, May 21st, 2024 Published a day early online
My Wild Irish Rose
“I don’t drink often” might sound good, but Saturday night, the pretend virtue of my saying it wore right off. The paint thinner that is Richard’s Wild Irish Rose wine washed away any moral posturing, showing me for who I truly am: a lightweight.
The glug glug glug of the dusty eleven-dollar bottle caught my attention. I looked down in horror, realizing I had poured myself a lot. The ice tinkled menacingly against the rather large glass.
It was Arnie’s idea, mom’s cousin in for a visit. He once bolted on a transmission without using a jack, just picked it right up. “We used to have a glass with grandpa. I like to remember him by it.”
Great grandpa L was a tough old dairy farmer with a warm heart. We became pen-pals after Great Grandma’s funeral. He’d write me about his potato garden, and I’d tell him about kid things. Time marched on without him, but I think of him now and then, proud to be from such tough stock. A drink to his memory sounded like a great idea.
I think this is bottled diesel fuel. Arnie started on his second glass. Mom finished her first. I had halfway to go.
Oh man. Bottoms up.
Ouch.
Hay is for Horses
The first hay cutting of the season is put up snug in the barn, ready for horses.
Carol’s Appalachian Word of the Week
Snoopy: picky, too particular. “Eat your dinner, you’re being too snoopy.”
Album of the Week
‘Round About Midnight (Miles Davis)
His 1957 debut on the Columbia label–a stunning collection of tunes with a brooding sound and (future) all-star lineup.
Happy Birthday, American Red Cross
Known as the “Angel of the Battlefield”, Nurse and Humanitarian Clara Barton founds the American Red Cross, today, 1881.
Also today: C. Lindbergh crosses Atlantic (1927), A. Earhart follows suit (1932).
Quote of the Week
“If I had to choose, I’d rather have birds than airplanes”
–Charles Lindbergh
Write to Us!
The Nighthawk is a new old-fashioned way to connect, published weekly. You’re invited to write back, or just enjoy reading. Let’s have some fun! It’s a social paper! Send stories, etc to: PO Box 783, Rustburg, VA 24588 or Joshurban@protonmail.com
Letters from Josh
(A weekly update from Josh Urban’s adventures on the farm and in the city. #186)
Appearing in the Altavista Journal, etc: Friday Night Lights
Howdy folks, and welcome back to the show! How ‘bout them lights? The Northern ones, that is–up in the sky on Friday. Holy smokes!
The evening of May 10th found me turning circles in the yard, waving my arms at the light show overhead, and then frantically texting astronomy buddies. “GO OUTSIDE NOW.”
Technically, the Sun underwent at least seven Coronal Mass Ejections (CMEs), sending a geomagnetic storm hurtling towards earth, where it was intercepted by our planet’s magnetic fields and the upper atmosphere, causing the auroras, according to experts. Yawn.
Sometimes astronomers are worse than boring history teachers, turning the dazzling into dull faster than you can sing “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.” I’ll try to fix that. Let’s try this as a movie trailer.
Macho announcer: “It was another Friday on Earth, when the only problem seemed to be a margarita shortage at the beach bars. But ninety three million miles away, a storm brewed. The Sun was having a bad day.”
The Sun: “I haven’t slept in 4.6 billion years, and I’m about to snap. I feel all twisted up. A fella can’t even get any coffee around here. It vaporizes anytime I try to drink it.”
The Sun’s shrink: “Have you considered working out? Hey, boxing would be good for you. Throw a few of those tangled magnetic fields out into space. It would center and calm you.”
The Sun: “I’m a nuclear reactor. I hate to be calm. Sounds like yoga to me.”
Shrink: “It’s not yoga. Try it. You’re the champ, champ.”
The Sun: “Fine. Get me my gloves. I think I’ll try beating up those nearby rocks.”
Macho announcer, back on Earth: “One star’s sparring is another planet’s doom. Electrical grids, computers, even cell phones will fry from the blast. Social media will be toast, and there would be nowhere to brag about it .Unless...a contender could stop the blows.”
Rocky music plays
Macho announcer: “In a spectacular match, the Sun’s temper runs into the only thing that might stop it. Introducing–the Chemicals. This Friday night, humble atmospheric oxygen and nitrogen molecules high above earth just might block the savage blows of the Sun’s radiation punches. Maybe. The rounds will be so powerful, the air itself will glow red and green. Now showing in southern states in a rare exhibition of ferocity. Don’t miss the greatest show above earth.”
Movie trailer or not, the lights sure were groovy. Our magnetic field and atmosphere won the round, and put on a breathtaking show while doing so. It’s nice to be shielded from the Sun’s high-energy particle boxing. Boy did the air glow!
With a faint greenish hue, the lights started, turning into red columns, and then morphing into an ever-changing tapestry of light. I stood on Earth, and looked up, stunned by the beauty. It was a rare sight so far south. I hope you saw them, too. But if not, take heart. The Sun will be grumpy again.
Keep looking up!
–Josh
